There's no other holiday that polarizes us quite as much as Valentine's Day. People either love it--or downright hate it. It's seen as either a great opportunity to celebrate love--or a holiday created by Hallmark to sell greeting cards.
Galtime.com reader Donita says she's never been a fan. "My boyfriend doesn't do Hallmark holidays. Nothing to show his love," she says.
And Trixie agrees wholeheartedly. "Makes me sad--would love to just have everyone who wants to celebrate it do it quietly amongst themselves!"
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While Emily, on the other hand, defends her love for the day of love. "I know it's a Hallmark holiday, but so what? It's an excuse for my husband to motivate to buy me HUGE boxes of cheap candy, so I can stick my finger in each and every one and eat the ones that don't have pink filling!"
And for Darlene, Valentine's Day has always been a family affair. "I think it's great. My mom made it special for her girls. Even now she still gives us a box of candy and card. My sis Cindy picked up on the tradition & brings me fresh flowers on Valentine's Day now. That's enough to make you teary eyed."
So how do you go from a hater to a lover? We asked relationship experts Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent, how to make Valentine's Day worth celebrating.
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"It’s a great day for couples because it gives us a great excuse to plan something special for the person we love," they say. "In a perfect world, couples would celebrate together every week (or at least every month), but in reality we’re all so busy that sometimes it only happens once a year. If it weren’t for Valentine’s Day, some couples would let a whole year pass by without celebrating their love together at all!"
But sometimes planning that celebration can end up feeling more stressful, than joyful. Especially for the guys.
"Most guys get nervous about impressing their girlfriends or wives," Lipper and Vincent say. "They don’t know what to do that isn’t a total cliché or that doesn’t cost a ton of money, and often feel insecure about the whole thing. It’s not uncommon for a guy to pick a giant fight before the big day just out of sheer terror, insecurity, and confusion about what to do for their lady."
So what can we ladies do to relieve those pressures? Well, a little reassurance goes a long way.
"They need to know that it doesn’t matter how much it costs as long as your gesture comes from the heart," the authors say. "It can be as simple as a sweet card and a cheap bottle of champagne, or as complex as a surprise weekend on a romantic desert island. As long as your woman knows that you took the time to plan something, just for her, she will be grateful."
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But, the authors add, that doesn't necessarily mean letting him off the hook all together. Heck, if Valentine's Day is important to you--don't pretend you don't care just for his sake!
"Don’t say that you think it’s a stupid Hallmark holiday and then cry into your pillow when he doesn’t plan anything," they say. "Be clear with him about your expectations (without actually making the plan for him), and he won’t feel any pressure because he’ll know exactly what he needs to do in order to make you happy."
Of course, we girls have pressure of a different sort. Namely that nosey coworker who you know is going to drill you the next day--on what your man did for you. So how do you face her if you decided to go low-key?
"Go to work and simply say, 'We decided to stay in and have a picnic in front of the fire,' or, 'No gifts in this economy!'," the authors suggest. "Don’t apologize for your relationship or how you choose to celebrate this holiday. We’re pretty sure that everyone will know from your Hot Chick glow and energy that your relationship is worth more than your jealous co-worker’s new diamond studs."
And lastly--what about all the single ladies out there? Are they doomed to have a lonely, miserable holiday? Absolutely not! says Lipper and Vincent.
"It’s a great day to get together with your single friends and celebrate your heyday by going out on the town or staying in and getting buzzed on too much wine and girl talk," they insist. "It’s also a great day to celebrate yourself by going to a spa or indulging in your favorite activities."
Or even make it a family affair!
"You can celebrate with the people who loved you first – your family. Is your dad or little sister alone on Valentine’s Day? Cook him or her a special dinner and we guarantee it’ll be appreciated."
So this Valentine's Day, leave the hating at the door. And join in on the celebration of love--in all its many forms!
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